Say more affirmations! Go for a walk. Get a pep talk from a friend. Make a list your accomplishments. Eat something healthy. Clean a small area of your room. Dance, sing, pout, moan, cry, yell, take a selfie. Send an email or text message. Write a blog post. Start a new project that you are excited about. Passion trumps excuses.
How do we continue trudging along trusting that what we are creating has merit, is important, and worth the sacrifice? I don’t know. I trust God, the angels, music, and nature. I trust my intuition. Perhaps self-doubt is a sign that we care about doing a good job, but we’re uncertain about our abilities. We often judge ourselves harshly.
My self-doubt has been returning as I get into the final stages of the manuscript becoming a book. My self-doubt reveals itself in the form of anxiety and procrastination. I start trying to control things, even more than usual. I am forced to look at old wounds which need healing. Not everyone will like my book, and that’s okay.
I breathe and let go of the outcome. I practice non-attachment in a compassionate way. The book moved through me, and we are parting ways. The book isn’t about me anymore. I was just the messenger. I’m letting go, so I can be free. Letting go is hard, holding on is harder.
I’ve become a better writer. I have more discipline and confidence. I reached out and made new friends. And yet…
The voice in my head still asks questions like: Why am I doing this? What if the book is terrible and I wasted my time? What if it doesn’t help anyone? What if I make a fool of myself? What if I’m wrong? What if there are grammatical errors no one found?
I can face my fears and flip those questions: What if it’s amazing and people love it? What if the book helped me get closure? What if the book creates new opportunities? What if people are inspired by my journey? What if I have the courage after all?
I recently got super excited by the idea of selling my book at book fairs and arts & crafts festivals. I could make magnets, jewelry, affirmation cards, lots of stuff. I have to thank Morgan for the idea, she posted an article that sparked the idea. I’m going to do some research, make a list of them, and look at the application process.
Have a good week,
Julie